I’m not going to document EVERY day of my 6 week program, but I thought I should share what happened today, whether to help someone else out, or to have some encouragement to look back on in the future.
I haven’t talked about it on here, but I work in the emergency department at the hospital, specifically in registration, or as the patients like to call me, “the money lady”. Today was just like every other day, long and busy. However, today I am extremely sore from the first day of this program which was leg and hamstring focused. Just a real quick f.y.i., this program has 3 variations of leg day every week. Anyway, so when I left work I went straight to the gym where my sister was waiting for me. I get to the gym and go into a changing room, get completely dressed only to find out that I forgot to put my running shoes in my gym bag. So I let my sister know that I am going home to get my shoes and I would be back. I get home and take my gym bag inside my apartment so I can leave it because I have already changed so I didn’t think I needed it anymore, and then I leave my apartment. While on my way back to the gym I remembered that both pair of my headphones are in my gym bag. Whatever, I’d just listen to the music the gym plays over the loud speakers.
Okay, now to get to the point of the post (LOL). I got to the gym and warmed up on the treadmill just as I always do, and then I got straight into Day 3 which is leg day “plyometrics” and this includes tons of different lunges and box jumps and a few other things. Until tonight I had never done a box jump. I have seen other people do them and they looked pretty simple. I was dead wrong. I was supposed to do 4 super-sets of goblet squats and box jumps. I barely did 2 sets. I gave up because I am more sore than I have ever been.
I was so upset with myself for giving up. I mean, it’s only day 3. I was so discouraged with not being able to do that super-set that I just got back on the treadmill for 10 minutes and then went home. I was in a sour mood when I got home so I took a shower because that is something I do when I want to make myself feel better, plus I did break a sweat at the gym. I do some of my best thinking while I am in the shower, and I tried to remember that I’m not giving up. I may have taken an L tonight, but I can just try again tomorrow. IT IS PERFECTLY OKAY that I didn’t push myself too hard tonight. I’m just going to have to take it day by day and build my strength until I am able to complete an entire workout. So, just like it always does, my shower helped me feel better, and then when I got out I needed just a little bit more encouragement for the night, so I opened up my daily devotional, Jesus Calling by Sarah Young (highly recommend) and of course, God had the perfect message waiting for me.
“Stop judging and evaluating yourself, for this is not your role. Above all, stop comparing yourself with other people…. Comparing is not only wrong, it is meaningless….”
This spoke volumes to me because while I was at the gym I was worried about people who saw me giving up after doing a couple lunges and stopping. But honestly, WHO CARES. The only validation I need is from myself and , more importantly, my God. I know I will get to where I want to be one day, I just have to cancel out the noise of the devil who is telling me to give up at every obstacle I come to.
So for anyone else out there doubting or feeling disappointed in themselves, IT IS OKAY if you have a weak moment or a weak day, as long as you try again!